Tvekan
När du står med en pistol
mot min svettbeklädda panna.
En kall mynning
som lämnar rött märke.
Kulorna står redo i sina stall.
Redo att springa,
Jaga mig likt en vettskränd hare.
Varför tar det en minut
för dig att få ett svar?
När jag vet att du står redo
att krama avtryckaren
lika gärna som en älskare kramar sin älskarinna.
Varför denna tvekan
att protestera ljudligt
när räddningen är blott ett ord bort.
Ordet som är så nära
känns så avlägset.
Miltals ned i halsen.
Oförmöget att nå ytan.
Tällfällig stumhet
drabbar mig.
Vad ska jag säga?
You told me
Why would I believe it true?
You told me the grass feels good between my toes.
I did not listen.
You told me to move on.
I ignored you.
Of all the things you told me,
I wish I only had listend for a second
or even tried.
Now I can only hope the sun is shining,
the grass growing over me feels good
and that you´ll move on.
Harsh truth
The bitter taste in my mouth.
Something foul that can't be ignored.
Something never felt before.
Yet sweet in a way.
A harsh truth, telling me:
Be true...forever.
I Bengt-Emils fotspår
luften tycks andas inspiration
och fåglarna sjunger atonala melodier.
Jag passerar Saxberget och begrundar,
nej avnjuter den vacka utsikten
du talat om så mycket.
En Gök stöter fram kvarter
högt ibland träden.
En enkel med dock så vacker sång.
Landskapet viskar små fraser.
Dikter som skapats just här
mitt ibland orrar och höst.
En stilla vandring i Rävvåla,
din eviga källa av inspiration
och jag minns, tänker, saknar.
Trend
Samma mönster, samma sak...
På något vis blir det alltid lika.
En trend svår att bryta,
svår att ändra.
Det slutar alltid lika.
En tråkig film med förutsägbart slut.
Inga överraskningar,
inget nytt.
Samma jävla trend.
Inquisition
I'm a sinner,
I always will be.
No point in judging me.
I am nothing else than what I was born.
After all, who can judge the lion
when it kills an innocent creature?
Driven by instinct, not evil.
Forced by nature to act,
with pleasure I do.
You say I am a poison,
Killing slowly, painfully.
I say I do what I need to do,
what I wish to do.
Do not try to make me regret.
If my way is wrong, then it's the wrong way I'll walk.
Walk proud down the lane of liberation.
I am my own.
Don't try to judge me.
Dream
in a world that cannot dream?
Why do we hope,
when we know all hope is gone?
A self-destructive place, a wasteland.
Why do we keep dreaming,
of things that will not be?
Why don't we give up right now,
save us the disappointment.
Stupid old dogs too stubborn to die.
Reflektion
veta att man haft något och kanske inte längre ha...
Bortryckt men ändå inte helt.
Att stå och se på något genom monterglas...
Alla tusen saker inom mig,
de splittrar mig.
När får jag? Får jag? Jag vill...jag vill så mycket...
(Väldigt personlig reflektion, jag vet)
Summer
Oh, beautiful summer...
Beautiful, gorgeous summer...
How I love thee.
The scent of flowers,
the feeling of warm grass underneath my feet.
I rejoice in happiness and celebrate,
every little bud, every little flower, every straw of grass.
Oh, beautiful summer...
Beautiful, gorgeous summer...
How I despise thee.
The horrid stench of flowers,
The feeling of inescapable grass everywhere.
I sneeze my brain out and snuffle.
Every little bud, every little damned flower, not to mention all the horrid grass.
Believe
Believe in consistency.
Believe in conservatism.
Believe that some things were never meant to change.
Bend it, form it, brake it.
No matter what, everything remains the same.
Cry, scream, fight!
All in vain...
Haiku
Gå förbi. Se mig inte.
Allt är som vanligt.
Poesi
min teurapeft och vän.
Vandrande vid min sida likt Vergilius följde Dante.
På krokig stig genom kargt landskap
följer du mig vid min sida.
När allt omkring oss vissnat och dött går vi.
Går tillsammans, oskiljaktiga.
Du räddade mig från avgrunden,
drog mig upp.
Du och jag.
Bottle of Angels
Oh holy water made by gods.
The final drops holds the solution
to every problem ever created.
The angels of the bottle,
keeping you company.
Soothing your every pain,
laying a sheet of dreams
over your dreadful thoughts.
The angels are your only friends,
whispering deceptive words in your ears.
Telling you one more glass solves it all.
Oh man, are you real?
Human feelings are gone.
You peed them out around ten a clock
then you hit the bars.
Dawn and a merciless sun arise.
Hits your eyes, telling you morning was hours ago.
The bruises on your arms reveal
the night’s adventures.
The angels are all gone.
Passed out for now
but soon they'll be back
asking you for more.
Dedication to spring
Horrid dangelines and daffodils!
A stench so foul
it makes my nose bleed.
Abhorable season of bloody joy.
So full of hypocrisy I wanna scream!
Damn springtime!
with its songs of unberable happiness
and naive lyrics and joyful tones.
They make me vomit my insides out,
puke like a rabid dog!
Damn, fucking springtime!
The sun forcing its way onto me
like an unwanted guest on christmas eve.
The warmth makes me sweat and smell.
Detestable time of year!
Damn spring and damn those daffodils!
I hate spring...
Fragile
Built from nothing but scrap.
Who made thee?
A shell of porcelain.
Weak to the bone.
Hit the ground and you'll break.
Put the pieces in earth,
plant a stone and mourn.
Hide behind denial,
lies and dreams.
Hold your eyes closed,
Cover your ears.
Do whatever you will.
In the end we all break.
Haiku
Snön tränger sig på.
Ovälkommen vintergäst.
Våren kommer snart.
Painful
Suddenly I feel numb.
No soothing words to calm me down.
No comforting drugs to make me gay.
A vomiting feeling comes crawling.
I feel like throwing up,heaving like a dog.
Drops of sweat runs down my face.
Pulling myself together so they won't see it hurts.
Flickering is all I see, it makes me shiver.
A ghostlike white color on my skin
and I feel pale like brought back from death.
I feel like passing out for every move I make.
A knife stuck in me, I cannot see.
Nor pull out or remove.
Tears begin to fall,
I take a deep breath and close my eyes.
Noone sees how bad it hurts.
Enduring the pain until it stops.
Poison
I drank it all.
I swallowed every last drop of that cursed liquid.
No remorse, no consideration.
For every drop I choked down, you smiled.
A grin so decieving and wide,
even the cheserie cat can't compare.
A potion full of hatred.
A bitter taste.
It was made from contempt, anger and despair.
A black and thik substance.
For every drop that touched my tounge, you cheered.
Feeling so joyful and happy
waiting to dance on my grave.
But I must dissapoint you my dear.
This is not a poison for me.
The more I drink, the more I grow.
Until I'm stronger than thee.
But I won't retalliate, nor seek revenge.
Who are you?
You know it. Don't you?
You've known all along.
The feeling you have opressed.
Buried deep in your subconcious.
Stop listening to yourself,
and listen to that little voice in your head saying
Worthless...
There are six billion people on this godforsaken planet.
What makes you so special?
A truth you do not wish to see.
Just a brick in a game.
A paw among paws.
"Who are you?" they sang.
So?
Who are you?
Justify your existance!
Prove that you are worthy to be called king.
Prove that you are worthy to be calle human!
Haiku
Tiden flyter sakta på.
Inget förändras.
